Mission Impossible

Ok. So I finally talked with Matthew's doctor today and got some discourageing news. He would like for me to feed Matthew 8 times a day. That means that I have to feed him every two hours from 8 in the morning til 10 at night which is an impossible mission for me. I am afraid that I will be burnt out in 4 days doing this schedule. That is not factoring in his medicine schedule and the fact that it is a fight every time I try to feed him already. The doctor really wants Matthew to be 14 lbs by his 6 month visit so I am going to be a nervous wreck until we get to that weight. In the mean time I think that Matthew looks extremely healthy and he is meeting several milestones that are a little ahead of schedule. He is already trying to sit up and has been rolling over for several weeks. Matthew is laughing and smiling all of the time not to mention sleeping like a log. *me knocking on wood* Is it possible that he is just a little baby right now???

In any event, we got several varieties of baby food tonight at the store. So far we have only tried sweet potaotes, squash and rice cereal. I got pears, apple sauce, bananas with mixed fruit, peas, green beans and bananas (plain). They had a sale so I went crazy. I think I am going to go ahead and start doing 2 servings of solids a day. Maybe that will help him pack on the weight.

Seth helped out A LOT today!!! I had to teach a piano lesson this morning and when I got home he had started a load of laundry, cleaned the dishes, picked up the living room and started cleaning up the our cats messes. Matthew was very happy and ready to eat when I got home. Sometimes he really comes through and helps out like this...maybe since he is home for the summer he will keep it up!!!

Have a good night everyone and remember to keep Noah in your prayers...I haven't heard an update on him in a few days. Look for the link to his blog on my blog list to the right.

Fun Times

What a beautiful smile!!!


Learning to use the computer at a very young age.


Matthew, Nana and Me


The Patterson Family

These pictures are from Nana's visit last week. I am so sad that she is already gone...to be honest last week seemed to fly by. Maybe the summer will go by slow so Seth, Matthew and I can enjoy the time we have together without it flashing by like the speed of light. I wish we had the money so I could be a stay at home mom. That is definitely out of the question now that we are buying the house.

Today Matthew was eating A LOT better. He even ate for almost 40 minutes at one feeding. I hope that he continues this trend and we can get back into a good routine. He has also been take very long naps in the morning and afternoon. I read somewhere that babies will sleep more often if they are not getting enough food. If this is true, I am scared that he is not getting enough to eat, but if I start giving him bottles I think he will try to wean even more off the breast. Pumping does not work very well for me unless I have missed a feeding in the morning so if he weans himself I might not be able to keep up with pumping. Knowing what to do can be so complicated sometimes!!!

We went out to eat tonight to Sonny's (our favorite BBQ joint). Man it was great and Matthew behaved himself very well. I am so proud of how well he does in public.

Well I better go for tonight. Keep us in your prayers about the breastfeeding. I hope we make the right decision.

Good night!!!

Another One Bites the Dust

Yet another stressful and frustrating day with Matthew and his newly found eating habits. Although last weeks bottle feedings were unavoidable, I think Matthew became used to eating in that way. Bottles are much faster and easier than the breast and it seems like Matthew wants the easy and lazy way of eating. Today it felt like the beginning with him...like I am starting over in trying to get him to eat as a newborn. Oh well, I guess I am going to struggle through it again because I love breastfeeding when things are working out right. In other words, I am not ready to wean him yet.

Seth was great today...in between feedings I got to go and take naps and get some much needed rest. I kept having horrible dreams last night. One dream was that Seth, Matthew and I were driving and Seth drove into a swimming pool. Seth and I got out and forgot all about Matthew. Then when we remembered him he was packed away safely in our suitcase but he was really small (like a newborn) again. Weird, huh??? I hate when I have weird dreams like that because I always feel like something bad is going to happen. Then when I checked the video monitor this morning..Matthew had unsnapped his PJs and had them wrapped around his chest and neck...so he was sleeping practically naked or just in his diaper. It scared me so bad I ran in to make sure he was still breathing. He was fine, but a little cold. I decided that any PJs that are 3 months were out at this point due to the fact that he is getting so long that he can kick himself out of them. So I am switching over to 6 month sizes or zippered PJs.


On another note...Matthew LOVES his Bumbo seat. With the little tray on it he can play with little toys. I can also use the whole thing as a little high chair so I can feed him his baby food while he sits up like a big boy. It seems like he is going to be left handed because he grabs the spoon with his left hand all of the time. Tonight was squash night and tomorrow I think I am going to try something green so we can change it up. He is eating the solids very well so I think he is ready for them. Maybe I should start doing cereal during the day and a solid at night. I might give it one more week of alternating between cereal one day and a solid the next.

I better go for tonight. Please keep praying that Matthew decides he wants to breastfeed without a struggle again. Also, there is a little boy named Noah that was shaken by his daycare provider. He had eye surgery the other day and I haven't heard much about him since. He is only 1 month older than Matthew and I couldn't imagine having to go through what his parents are going through right now. Please keep him in your prayers and if you would like to get info and read his story you can click on Noah's Road under my Blog list. I do not know his family personally but they are in need of lots of prayers.

Good night!!!

School's Out For Summer

School is officially over for summer...I guess that means I am back on maternity leave. My mom left today so now we have to focus on packing up our house for the big move at the end of June.

Matthew is back to being fussy with his eating today. We went a couple of days with him getting better but now he has taken 2 steps backwards. I really do not think it has anything at all to do with what I am eating because he takes a bottle of breast milk just fine. I called Matthew's doctor today to talk to him about these issues but he didn't return my call. Maybe he can give me some advice on what I should do to help my little guy gain weight faster. He might not even be concerned. Hopefully he will call tomorrow to let me know more information.

When my mom was here she got us a video camera (which will be our Christmas present) so I will be posting videos of Matthew soon.

Have a great night!!!

Nana's Leaving :(

Nana will be leaving tomorrow so Seth, Matthew and I will be left to our self for the beginning of the summer. Now we have to pack all of our stuff up to move into our new house on June 24th (our closing date).

School is officially over even though I have to go for a teacher planning day tomorrow. Honestly, I have to find some way to not think about the fall right now so I have convinced myself that I am back on maternity leave!!!



Today Nana got Matthew a Bumbo seat and he loves it. I used it to sit him in while I fed him some squash (which is new) and he ate half the jar in one sitting. I was very impressed with him and the breastfeeding went much better today. Maybe he is making a turn out of this phase. He has also been taking much more frequent naps so I hope that is a sign that he has a full tummy. I know that he has enjoyed getting to know his Nana all day long while I have been going to work. They do alot of fun things together and he does seem happy. Today when I got home he gave me a huge smile but then immediately wanted to nurse (even though he had eaten about an hour before I got home). I think that was his way of saying he missed me.




All in all, going back to work wasn't bad this week. I don't know if it was because Matthew was with my mom or if I just needed a different kind of job for a while but I wasn't so freaked out about not being around him all day. Maybe that is an indication of how it will be in the fall.

Have a great night!!!

Slow Gains

Although Matthew didn't lose weight...he didn't gain as much as I had hoped he would. He went from 12 lbs 2 oz to 12 lbs 11 oz. This 9 ounce gain was very disappointing as I had hoped he would break the 13 pound mark today (secretly I wanted him to be 14 pounds). We are going to keep on trying to gain. I spoke to a Lactation Consultant a few days ago to see if there is anything I can do to help my situation and get him to gain weight but all they seemed to do is tell me that I can't eat ANY dairy products. Casein and Whey especially and those two ingredients are in everything in my cabinet right now. I was so frustrated because after I spent about 30 minutes on the phone with this crazy lady, she cancelled my appointment and passed me off to the head LC. It seems like they are wanting to change my entire diet and have the misconception that I want Matthew off of his medication. They also told me to stop all solids and basically made me feel stupid for starting them in the first place. Now I am afraid to give him anything and doubting every "food" decision I have ever made wit him. I really wished to have someone come out and observe a feeding to make sure that we were doing everything right. Then watch how he unlatches and cries so maybe they could give me some advice on how to keep him eating...not completely change my diet. FYI Never mention reflux to a LC...its like saying epidural to a doula.

To top it all off...their fee is $125.00 for the first hour and a half and $35.00 for every half hour after that. The phone fee is $70.00 for the first hour and follow up emails have a fee as well. I am not that willing and able to make those drastic changes in my diet so I do not want to pay the money. I think what I am looking for is a little encouragement that I am doing everything right and that the latch and milk supply is good. I just really HATE being passed off and I refuse to contact these people again. It seems like everytime I ask for help nurses and LC are making me feel inadequet instead of giving encouragement.

On a much happier note...Matthew, Nana and I went to school today together. The kids got to see Matthew and they were very excited. Matthew only got upset and started to cry during my 1st grade class and Nana took him for a little walk to the teachers lounge. After that Matthew ate (for about 10 minutes on the breast and then about ounces of a bottle). He fell asleep during my 3rd grade class (which was amazing because they were loud). We all went to Wendy's for lunch then returned to the school where he took another little nap then ate. At 2:15 or we left and went to the doctor to get weighed. After the doctor we came home and he ate again. We went to this resturaunt called Mutineer and it was very good. We had a nice evening visiting a park where Matthew enjoyed a stroller ride and watching the ducks with their babies (I liked that too). Then I came home to a grumpy baby. I understand because he has been up since 6:45 this morning with only a few little naps. I know he will sleep good tonight.

Please keep my little guy in your prayers. I know that there are many other babies out there that are much worse off than Matthew, but it scares me that he can't gain weight quickly. Right now he is the 3rd percentile for weight and 7th percentile for height. I really do not want to start formula but he might not give me any other options.

Have a wonderful night!!!

It's Off To Work I Go...

I didn't post yesterday because I was very tired after my first day back at work. Matthew did very well the last couple of days with my mom. They had fun sitting on the front door steps and Matthew watched some shows on PBS that he really enjoyed. When I got home he was very happy to see me and smiled really big for me. I miss him so much during the day. It will be very hard to go back to school in the fall and put him in daycare.

Being at work has been easier than I expected. The faculty at my school has made me feel so welcome and that makes me more comfortable to be away from Matthew. Today another teacher who had a baby about 2 months after Matthew was born was at school and I got to hold her baby. He is adorable and it was nice to get to hold another baby for a little while. I am going to post some pictures of Matthew laughing the other day...he is so cute!!!







Tomorrow is the big weigh in so keep your fingers crossed for little Matthew. I hope he weighs close to 14 pounds!!! Please pray that he does well. He is also going to my school in the morning with my mom and me. I can't wait for him to see the kids and get to see his momma teach music class. We only have two half days left. I have to go through the end of the week and then I am back in baby world for the summer.

Have a great night everyone!!!