Yet another stressful and frustrating day with Matthew and his newly found eating habits. Although last weeks bottle feedings were unavoidable, I think Matthew became used to eating in that way. Bottles are much faster and easier than the breast and it seems like Matthew wants the easy and lazy way of eating. Today it felt like the beginning with him...like I am starting over in trying to get him to eat as a newborn. Oh well, I guess I am going to struggle through it again because I love breastfeeding when things are working out right. In other words, I am not ready to wean him yet.
Seth was great today...in between feedings I got to go and take naps and get some much needed rest. I kept having horrible dreams last night. One dream was that Seth, Matthew and I were driving and Seth drove into a swimming pool. Seth and I got out and forgot all about Matthew. Then when we remembered him he was packed away safely in our suitcase but he was really small (like a newborn) again. Weird, huh??? I hate when I have weird dreams like that because I always feel like something bad is going to happen. Then when I checked the video monitor this morning..Matthew had unsnapped his PJs and had them wrapped around his chest and neck...so he was sleeping practically naked or just in his diaper. It scared me so bad I ran in to make sure he was still breathing. He was fine, but a little cold. I decided that any PJs that are 3 months were out at this point due to the fact that he is getting so long that he can kick himself out of them. So I am switching over to 6 month sizes or zippered PJs.
On another note...Matthew LOVES his Bumbo seat. With the little tray on it he can play with little toys. I can also use the whole thing as a little high chair so I can feed him his baby food while he sits up like a big boy. It seems like he is going to be left handed because he grabs the spoon with his left hand all of the time. Tonight was squash night and tomorrow I think I am going to try something green so we can change it up. He is eating the solids very well so I think he is ready for them. Maybe I should start doing cereal during the day and a solid at night. I might give it one more week of alternating between cereal one day and a solid the next.
I better go for tonight. Please keep praying that Matthew decides he wants to breastfeed without a struggle again. Also, there is a little boy named Noah that was shaken by his daycare provider. He had eye surgery the other day and I haven't heard much about him since. He is only 1 month older than Matthew and I couldn't imagine having to go through what his parents are going through right now. Please keep him in your prayers and if you would like to get info and read his story you can click on Noah's Road under my Blog list. I do not know his family personally but they are in need of lots of prayers.
An Innocent Victim
4 months ago